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Vicky Mochama: The voice of Metro News.

Brands you can trust when the world starts to burn: Vicky Mochama

Right-wing media has been assuring us that a race war is forthcoming. Done properly, it’s a marketer’s dream.

Kendall Jenner featured in an ad for Pepsi, which received much backlash online, and was subsequently pulled off air.

YouTube/Pepsi

Kendall Jenner featured in an ad for Pepsi, which received much backlash online, and was subsequently pulled off air.

When the revolution starts, which brand will be there for me?

I wondered this as I watched the caffeinated cola ad starring Kendall Jenner as a model-turned-protest leader. In it, she solves police brutality by handing a police officer a non-Coke soda. When she does it, a cheer goes up in the crowd as if to say, “We realize the police were hypoglycemic. Thanks, Kendall!”

After much backlash, the company has pulled the ad. They’re not the only ones to pull ads this week.

The New York Times reported that Fox News blowhard Bill O’Reilly has had to pay out $13 million in sexual harassment lawsuits over the last few years. Forty advertisers (and counting) have responded by pulling their ads from O’Reilly’s show, including major ones like Mercedes Benz, BMW, AllState Insurance and GlaxoSmithKline.

None of these companies pulled their ads from the network last July when allegations surfaced about Fox News CEO Roger Ailes sexually harassing employees. (He left the company soon after.) Maybe all those brands were just monitoring the situation.

Nine months after Ailes’ departure, women must be overjoyed that dental company Invisalign is standing up for women.

There’s really no reason for brands to be left out of dismantling capitalism.

In fact, between caffeinated beverages and luxury cars, it is invigorating to find brands that will be there to support the dismantling of systems of oppression.

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For example, right-wing media has been assuring us that a race war is forthcoming. Done properly, it’s a marketer’s dream.

With their long-standing work on buying cool via basketball stars and rap music, Sprite will surely offer to be the drink of black people. Nothing says cool and refreshing like a battle for racial superiority.

I have been planning my outfit for the race war for sometime, but what I am really hoping is that Beyonce’s athleisure line, Ivy Park, will supply our uniforms. Canadians who decline to take part can pick up their non-combatant grey sweats from Race War Amnesty title sponsor Roots.

But it’s not just during the upcoming race war (sponsored by Halliburton?) when brands can find a lucrative market.

There are unique opportunities right now. As the resistance to Donald Trump coalesces in the United States, there is a profitable opportunity for Staples to provide branded poster board to marchers. In addition to their Easy button, they could issue a “RESIST” button.

There is a product for every consumer. It’s just a matter of finding the company that fulfills your desire for de-funding private prisons but also serves the best latte.

Gil Scott Heron was right. The revolution will not be televised.

It will be streamed live on YouTube and hosted by BuzzFeed. 

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